tag-of-the-month

was tagged a long time back by pixie to list down 9 of my most vivid and special memories... i'm doing only the special part today... the ones i r'ber vividly are too random to put down as memories. the mushy nature is due to being alone at home... it tends to make me all senty and nostalgic!  

so, in no particular order... these are my tag-of-the-month moments: 

- walking down marine drive while it drizzled. u haven't lived if you haven't done this. it's just SO special. 

- reaching home from school to an excited dog who'd ALWAYS be happy to see me. no matter what my day had been like.  

- suruchi's house. all the evngs spent there... chatting, bitching, cribbing, whining... mostly, bitching... there was a comfort in knowing she was 10 mins away. and i really really miss that.  

- going off on drives on sundays with the family. EVERY sunday. all four of us. not knowing that this won't last forever. and soon we'd have to make plans just so 4 of us could be under the same roof together. sigh. 

- the 4 days i spent at minal's in 2004, when i was SO unsure of where i was headed in life. 

- galadriel visiting me on my bday last year. she was the first blog-pal i was to meet... and i was quite unsure how i'd live up to my virtual image. i am still amazed by how comfortable we all were with each other! 

- dad calling and telling me that i'd got through to mica. i made him read it out to me. i was afraid he mis-read NOT accepted, as accepted!

- feeling intimidated by the brightness of people who worked with me at c2w. not knowing whether i deserved to be there... with them... in the same room. *this was way back when i wasn't as smart-assed abt myself!*

- saying goodbye to dewey at the bus-stop. she was leaving for india the next day... and i'd be gone from london by the time she got back. *i'm not good with good-byes*

- landing for the first time in the US. and thinking that vin wouldn't be there to pick me up coz he'd acquired cold feet and wanted to back-out! yeah, i REALLY thought he wouldn't turn up and i'd have to figure out a way to go back. i was more relieved than happy to see him there. 

i realized i've already crossed the limit of nine. but i don't think memories is something that can be limited by quantities. which, again, is the reason i blog. to r'ber things... such that i don't need to limit them. and there's a dozen more i'd like to add here... but then again, some are much too private and much too special to be shared. so, for blog & tag purposes... this should do for now! 

see y'all soon. 

remember the time...?

sometimes, i think a bad memory is a wonderful thing to have. when u can't rber where u were ten/fifteen years ago... with whom or what you were doing/saying... i think it would be wonderful to be like that.
me? i vividly r'ber every random detail of my life. i have to think, of course... and it sometimes just comes to me.. without a reason.
for instance:
i r'ber the license plate of the fiat we had when i was 5.

i r'ber the license plate of the school bus which i used to take to school. and the driver's name.

i r'ber getting home my first kitten... i must have been around 5 or 6... we got her from one of dad's friend... i r'ber their house in detail though i've never been there again.

i r'ber that a friend of mine from school borrowed this really cute skirt i had - and she didn't return it. the wierd thing is, i didn't r'ber this back then... when i should have asked her. i r'bered it this morning... while making bfast. and i rummaged through my belongings to see if i still had it. then i called mom and asked her if it was home. she didn't r'ber what i was talking abt.. so i had to explain, in detail! *yeah, i'm quite irritating that way when i want something!*
and now that it's not there.. i rber that she'd borrowed it... and that was the last i've seen of it. sigh.

i r'ber what i wore on my bday when i was 8.

i r'ber refusing to eat rice with my hands when i was 9... we'd gone to a rel's place and they hadn't given me a spoon or a fork.. and i asked them for one. i was told "rice should be eaten with your fingers only" and i said "i don't think i want to eat rice then".

i r'ber names of girls from school... some of whom i've never spoken to.

i r'ber this guy i knew - via some friends - going through a really bad time after his girlfriend dumped him. and i don't think i've ever spoken to him.

i r'ber C teaching me how to apply eye-liner when we were back-stage at a college do. actually, i owe all my make-up tips to her. and to think we went to the same school and hardly spoke to each other there!

i r'ber bdays of ppl i have hardly known. really. i still r'ber one of my friends ex-boyfriends bdate. i'm sure even she must have forgotten it by now!

i r'ber the number of the first credit card i had. this was abt 8 years ago... and i have no reason to r'ber it. funnily, i don't rber vin's CC number!

i r'ber when vibha and i were first introduced, after my interview at c2w - she was planning the office party, and i was the new recruit - her first line to me was "hi!!! so, what do u drink? beer, vodka, whiskey?" while i stared at her and contemplated my decision. from then, to now... i've sure come a long way!

i r'ber losing my wallet and having to take the auto to a friend's place so he could pay it off. then i borrowed money from him till i could get my new debit card! it took 2 weeks, for them, to give it to me. and yes, i paid him back.

i r'ber suruchi saying to me - after a couple days of us having been introduced - "thank god u're normal!"

i r'ber the first time vin and i mailed each other. i don't rber any of the mails after that.

obviously, memory retention doesn't seem to be selective here. so i r'ber all the good, not-so-good and the bad things. about random things and ppl who hardly affected my life even then. and i can't help but think that i'm forgetting some important things. important to me, maybe. bcoz there can be only limited space, right? only so many sections for memories? and mine are crammed with irrelevant details. no wonder i forget SO much that i should remember! it's not coz i'm getting older. it's coz i'm out of space!

tag of the month

pick six, says pix...

so here i am.. .

what i had to do: 

go to the 6th folder in my pics folder.. 

pick the 6th pic.

tell u a story abt it. 

6th folder in my pics.. was "oman"

6th pic there was this. 

this is the fort at barka *a beautiful little village just outside muscat - i think it was an hour's drive away*... made completely with mud.  it's hundreds of years old *this means that i've forgotten how old it is and don't feel like googling!* and in perfectly good condition. it is not, however, open to the public anymore. *i'm guessing THAT is why it's in such impeccable condition.* 

behind it are natural hot water springs. and a valley with little mud houses with absolutely gorgeous colorful doors! the valley had corpses of headless goats. to appease the evil spirits, so they *the spirits* would not devour the cattle or goats owned by the people living there.

brought back memories... this pic. been a while since i saw these pics. remembered how much i'd loved the place... and the warmth of the locals! 

i tag dewdrop, purnima and galadriel... to pick one pic from their albums...and tell us the story behind it. 

it's all in d mind...

woke up feeling a tad blue in the morng. then thot, let's dig in and see if i have my 'wizard of oz' with me. it's been one of my "happy books". along with alice, peterpan & d ilk. checked on books on table. checked in closet. not there. nearing panic, checked in "book corner" *yeah, i have one in my house*. checked in d storage box also. *yeah, u guessed right. we don't have a bookshelf anymore. the old one was emptied & kept on d patio to gather some sunshine. it got soaked in d rain.*

damn! where was my wizard of oz?? "home, in a 'safe' place. with most of your other books." piped up Voice-in-Head sarcily.

maybe it's the day that's doing it. maybe the distance. maybe just age. these days, with me, it doesn't take much for a passing thought to cascade, inadvertently trip over itself, multiply in magnitude, sulk, scream out intense emotions and eventually morph into pure nostalgia.

and so it was, with not finding my Wizard of Oz. at that instance, i knew what i longed for. no, not "books". no, it was nothing tangible. nothing material at all.

i missed the trail of my life. hoarded carefully. sometimes randomly, usually impulsively. over d years. every little detail. every moment. every association. it all amounted to something. or so i liked to think. small incidences and instances that i'd brought home to seek refuge with me that became permanent residents without me realizing it. sometimes, forgotten soon after getting them home. but always available. at-hand, as i like to say! always there when u reach out.

i miss those pieces. those symbols of continuity.

but no sooner did i think i knew, than did Voice-in-Head pipe up again: "what continuity? continuity is a myth. just like forever. what was, is only what you remember of it. your interpretations. shared memories. individual perceptions. and what 'is' is but illusions on the horizon - adaptable, malleable, infinite. reach out, get them & see what you make of them."

and as suddenly as it had piped up, Voice-in Head silenced down. moved on, maybe? leaving no trace that it had been there. that moment. in my head. except, of course, for me. and my perception *knowledge, maybe?* of me having heard. and may i say, comprehended.

some thingz...

some things have such strong associations.

- i can never have croissant and coffee without thinking of suruchi. and that early morng happy feeling. which only croissant, coffee and her company at that hour could induce.
- vague behaviour, piya basanti, understanding without speaking have and probably always will bring back recollections of minal. things, which nobody else can begin to understand... she makes it seem so normal. it's always nice to know that so much madness is normal.
- bright colors, hot, skimpy clothes, baileys, item numbers, dancing, fussing over me like i was d "specialest" person... they're so vibs! sometimes, i feel she's d sister i should've had!
- big words, incomprehensible sentences, foolish accidents... shud i call him "he-who-cannot-be-named?" no, not lord voldemort! a publicity-shy, mega-achiever fren of mine! *yeah, this type is nearing extinction.*
- late night conversations, brain-storming, workaholism, bong music... how else wud i have appreciated d finer things in life, rite joy?
- bright yellow, t-series, sleazy isolated approach lane, bollywood, excel sheets, good food, parle G, fun, madness, chaos, deadlines, numbers, himesh, lack of content, "zones", cliched phrases, bad coffee, good frenz, yellow stars & moons, lunch-hour shopping... hungama, aka home, for a period.
- space & time to sort out d mind, pathway near the lawns, 'pal', 'sacrifice', jagjit singh - all mixed up... chhota, cheese maggi, masti, cold cocoa, common bathroom *with lizards/frogs*, monitor lizards, good memories, chicken on wednesdays & saturdays, camel-cart rides under beautiful starry skies, truck rides to watch a movie, solitude, long walks... i see/hear ANY of these anywhere, i can't help miss MICA. *notice d lack of acads in that list?*

there's so much more... but this is a mere post. and i know, the longer i make it, the more nostalgic i'll feel!
memories, madness... is there a limit to it? am happy to realize there isn't!