Mar 20, 2009

just a thought...

they say that it takes adversity to bring out the best in a couple. that if a couple stays together... stands by each other through difficult times... then they will stay together no matter what.

i wonder how a couple would know that they've been through enough? it's one thing to say "i know we will be happily together, forever" and it's another to really really understand and mean it.

and once they know... do the tough times stop? or is it like the GRE... if you manage to survive through the tough times... going forward.. they only get tougher?

edited to add:
'forever', for the purview of this post, refers to "till death do us part".

25 comments:

La vida Loca said...

Nothing lasts forever....

alice-in-wonder said...

Tough questions!

Pavi!!!! said...

Definition of tough,difficult and even fOREVER is all relative!!!

n sumtimes i think FOREVER is an illusion..just like perfection!

Prashanti :) said...

hmmm really tough questions !!! I think there comes a sense of pride and satisfaction along with relief to know that you have gone through really tough times together and have survived them .. The key is to have atleast one person in the relationship who has the patience and the ability to think of the good times that were and can be, even when youre going through the murkiest of fights and the loomiest of days !!

K 3 said...

Cynical me says - this is all crap spewed by folks to keep the marriage institution alive, just like folks often say "you already have a kid, another should be easy"!!

Its all a conspiracy, I tell you! :D

Galadriel said...

i of course have nothing constructive to say.. nothing new. :P

but i think the little goldfish is adorable. can i keep him?

Pixie said...

Forever - is hope...
It's faith in your partner...

roop said...

they know that they've been through enough when they can both swallow pride every time anger strikes. arguments will happen but a relationship's tenacity is judged by how those arguments are handled. if the disagreement lingers on for a long time ... let's say more than half an hour ... and it is frequent ... something somewhere is amiss.

partners in their good times need to promise each other that they'd swallow ego when they both get mad at each other. one of 'em will have to swallow it to ask for forgiveness and other will have to swallow it and forgive.

nothing is forever ... but ... it can be made forever if two ppl are willing to behave like adults and work things out practically rather than get emotionally swayed in the toughest of times. :)

or so i feel imho. :) hope all's great with u. did u get me number?

DewdropDream said...

Yeah I always did wonder too, how do you know if what you've gone through is actually the toughest of things?

I like K3's point :D

Let's gift G a goldfish in a bowl... should keep her happy :D Or two. Then she can name them after us :D

rayshma said...

dewey: u know where to find yellow godfishes? :D

roop: that, really makes sense to me. love the thought.
and no, haven't got ur number :(

pix: yeah, but that hope can be turned into reality, no? just takes work, i guess...

G: u can... if u promise not ot eat him.

K3: LOL!!! :D

prashanti: i think both need to be like that... it could be at different times, though. gives both the opportunity to sulk! :D

pavi: forever's subjective.. that's all.

alice: good to see u back here! :)

loca: forever for me? some things may... they may change.. but they'll be there..

Ankur said...

1st is who says that??

forever means nothing... but its a point of saturation!! :)

and its like climbing a moutain... someday u will reach the top... even everest is vincible!! :)

Cheers!!

DewdropDream said...

Godfish? no. Goldfish... maybe ;) :D

Orchid said...

when u are going though something terrible...you just stick it out, you dont stop to think if this is it - the big one and no the tough times dont stop...seriously, life never gets back to where it was - your job, your career, financial responsibilities, then your kids, then your parents......just to name a few, it only gets tougher but as you age, your attittude changes too..u learn to laugh, live and move on and it helps you have someone who understands and stands by you....sorry, long one, this!

rayshma said...

orchie... totally agree with you... pls feel free to leave loong comments.. me likey! :)

dewey: hehee... you editor, you! i gave her a pwetty golden goldfish. she still no louve me! :(

ankur: i don't quite agree.
a mountain has a top... a visible goal... that's not the case with r'ships. there's no "end goal"... it's dynamic.
if u're with the right person, there's no saturation in a r'ship. it evolves, as do both of you.

Galadriel said...

i pwomise i pwomise!!

get me a regular goldfish and i will paint him yellow. actually if i am painting a goldfish i'd rather go with a purple. or turquoise blue.:D

DewdropDream said...

G you get two goldfishes. Okay one blue fish (to save you the effort of painting and the cost of paint) and a goldfish, on the condition that you name them Catty and Phataka. Oh and watch out coz Catty's making full plans of gobbling them up :D

PURN!MA said...

not-yet-married (or even in a relnshp) so kinda inexperienced. :) so dint understand. :P and thats why aiyyem daaaammnn konphoosed!

lostonthestreet said...

was i dreaming or last night you had a different template? I like this one better :-)And hey welcome back

rayshma said...

lost: well... i changed the template 3 times today! :D i think i'll let this be a while... thx! :) so far, u're the only person who's liked it! :D

purnima: arre not to be kaanphused abhi se. there is lots of time to get mindfucked later! ;)

dewey: i don't want her to name a fish catty... i can imagine a blog-post saying "i woke up to find catty floating in the bowl. DEAD!" morbid child you are.
and yes, i MAY gobble up the fish. u know how i feel abt that. :D

Monsieur K said...

welcome back! :)

Keshi said...

there's no FOREVER when it comes to TIME...FOREVER is in the MOMENTS we share with our loved-ones...cos they r what LASTS.

Keshi.

Suma said...

whoa! i like this one, but a pink devilini? aren't we sooooo demanding?!!!!

:))

Lena said...

why do they need to know they have been through enough btw?
shouldnt they just live happily and trying to build up a healthy beautiful relationship?

Just a thought..

Pinku said...

those are very cynical questions....

no life doesnt stop sending bad times just because u have managed to overcome a few.

Just that knowing you have someone to go through it with makes it somewhat easier. Somewhat.

MJS said...

Madam, if you stop having arguments in a relationship, either one of you has lost your identity or simply lost interest!

So its healthy to have tough times!